Opinions

You will realise one day that people like the sound of their own voice.

Some people think that their opinion is so important; they’ll talk over someone else to express it.  When a discussion takes place, the one with the loudest voice will drown out the more considered views.  I see it all the time, people will be chatting about something – I think I have something valid to add, I wait for a gap in the conversation, start to say my bit, only to find I’m talked over and ignored – like my input, my voice, isn’t worth listening to. So I shut up.

Now I used to think it’s because I talk rubbish, but in fact it’s because I don’t talk about the subjects they want to talk about or because I disagree with them, or maybe they just think I’m boring?  I often find their subject boring, mundane, pointless or just plain wrong – but at least I give them the courtesy of listening.

It’s said that people like that are assertive, are passionate about what they believe in.  I think they’re just ignorant.  Either that or they’re afraid.  Afraid that if someone else gets heard, then they’ll be ignored, shut out, talked over.

It frustrates me that I am often ignored.  I am angered by other people’s lack of manners, but shouting louder is not going to solve the issue.  Instead, choose your moments wisely, make sure what you say is valid and accurate and concise.  Great speakers don’t always shout their message loudest, they engage their audience, capture their attention and hold them enthralled.  If you can learn to do that, you could whisper your opinion and it would be heard.

Why is it so hard to change my lifestyle?

15 years ago I gave up smoking overnight – just decided that now was the right time for me, and I went cold turkey.  I knew it was bad for me, and my new girlfriend didn’t like it, so I stubbed out my last cigarette and haven’t looked back since.

But now I want to cut down on alcohol use, yet the little voice in my head still whispers about having a glass of wine, and I cannot walk past the bottle of scotch without a sideways glance!  When I do then have a drink, I find it hard to limit the consumption to a sensible amount – a glass or two becomes three or four, then a shot or two to follow.  I wake next morning feeling rough, vowing to myself “never again” but that is soon forgotten.  I never learn.

I know I need to cut down on eating salty food, and fatty food, and processed food, but the lure of the Chinese takeaway is too great.  Or another packet of crisps!  At the moment I’m eating those pasta-in-a-mug type packets, which are laden with salt, sugar, and other stuff that’s not good for me – but I choose the less than 3% fat ones to fool myself into thinking I’m opting for the healthier choice. 

I love cooking and preparing food – I can quite happily prepare a delicious salad with something like fishcakes to accompany it – but if there’s the slightest hint that I could have some junk food, I’ll gladly put off the healthier food choice in favour of the fast food fix.  I seem to be addicted to fatty, salty foods!

Then there’s the whole exercise thing.  I know I need to stay fit in order to get the most out of life.  I don’t much care for swimming, I find it quite boring.  I like cycling though, but despite thinking “I fancy a bike ride” I never get the bike out! I own a dozen fitness dvd’s and a wii fit, a Reebok step, a skipping rope, dumbells – none of them get used!  Why am I so lazy?  I know deep down that any effort I make today will reap rewards several times over tomorrow, and that once I get into the exercise routine, the addictive quality of the endorphins will keep me going – so why is it so hard to start?

I know these small, simple lifestyle changes are easy to make.  I know the change will be for the best, and that if I gave myself a chance, I would enjoy the changes.  My quality of life will be greatly improved, my health and vitality will be better.  My sleep will improve, my energy will increase, my attention will not so easily be distracted.  I will look and feel better.  I will be happier.

So why can’t I just get started?  Why is my will so weak?  I’ve even tried small steps – “just make one small change today!”  Er…no.  Grab some crisps and watch TV instead.  OK, great idea!  Is it laziness or lack of motivation?  Do I not care that I’m restricting myself to a life of being overweight and lethargic?  It just doesn’t make sense! 

Am I a Geek, a Nerd, or just having a Mid Life Crisis?

This is me laughing at myself...
I'm not really laughing.  I'm wondering whether I'm riding the wave of social media-blogging-pinteresting stumbling, tumbling youtubing infomedia - as a 51 year old overweight male, enjoying a freedom of information, trawling the 'net in an awesome horizon broadening knowledge download.  Or am I just going through a midlife crisis?

I was born in the 60's - and if I wanted to send my cousin in the USA a picture of me on holiday I whipped out the Kodak, reeled off 24 or 36 pictures - the quality of which would only be revealed by my local Boots chemist after I'd jetted back from wherever (never to return).  The photograph would be accompanied by a handwritten letter on the thinnest of thin paper, slid carefully into a thinner blue envelope and posted Par Avion, to arrive a few weeks later (if at all).

But now, I can snap the moment on my smartphone, and if I don't like it I can snap it again, and I can edit the picture, and I can email or SMS is to anyone in the World close to instantaneously - or I can upload to my social media site and tag to my hearts content.  I can check in, and hey, in a years time I will be reminded of where I was, who I was with and what my political leanings were.  I might even have a picture of what I had for dinner!

Once upon a time, if I needed to find out how to strip down a lawnmower I would either ask my granddad, find a friendly lawnmower repair shop tucked down some alley way off the High Street, or I'd go to my local library and look in the reference section.  No longer do I have that inconvenience!  Just as well, because granddads are a dying breed now - soon to be replaced by "why don't you Google it?"  The little shop has closed down because people will now throw away the defective mower and buy a new one, and I am amazed we still have libraries!

I have embraced this new technology with open arms.  I love my laptop/tablet/smartphone.  I play Scrabble on my smartphone.  On my own.
If I thought I was antisocial before the advent of this technology, Lord only knows what I am now!

When I was a kid, if you wanted a moving image in a notebook you drew little stick figures in the bottom corner on every page, making each one a little different, and flicked through them to form a flick-book.  Now, my daughter asks if she can do her homework in PowerPoint so she can animate it!

My worry is am I a geek, a nerd or just a sad middle aged man trying to be cool?

The upside of this however is things like this blog.  I'm just writing my thoughts down, some random chatter that's meant to be funny.  If I wanted to do this years ago I'd have to have a job with a newspaper or a magazine - publishing my byline fortnightly.  I would need to have studied, qualified, acquired references, developed a portfolio, networked at parties (ugh! sorry, there's my antisocial side showing again) and made connections - but now I just ramble on here and if I'm lucky, people will read it.

The downside though is, the internet is full of this stuff.  That journalist went through all that malarkey for a reason - to weed out the dross, so that articles were only written by accomplished writers, who checked their facts, who researched their subject, who were accountable for their plagiarism, slander and such.  The veracity of some of what you see on the internet cannot be guaranteed, and posts on social media get shared and liked and bandied about without anyone checking if what they're publishing is true or not.

I like this new world that I'm a part of, where so much of what you want or need is at your fingertips. It's what I dreamed about in the 70's - being a part of the world, and not just a part of my street.  If I wanted broader horizons I certainly got them!