Opinions

You will realise one day that people like the sound of their own voice.

Some people think that their opinion is so important; they’ll talk over someone else to express it.  When a discussion takes place, the one with the loudest voice will drown out the more considered views.  I see it all the time, people will be chatting about something – I think I have something valid to add, I wait for a gap in the conversation, start to say my bit, only to find I’m talked over and ignored – like my input, my voice, isn’t worth listening to. So I shut up.

Now I used to think it’s because I talk rubbish, but in fact it’s because I don’t talk about the subjects they want to talk about or because I disagree with them, or maybe they just think I’m boring?  I often find their subject boring, mundane, pointless or just plain wrong – but at least I give them the courtesy of listening.

It’s said that people like that are assertive, are passionate about what they believe in.  I think they’re just ignorant.  Either that or they’re afraid.  Afraid that if someone else gets heard, then they’ll be ignored, shut out, talked over.

It frustrates me that I am often ignored.  I am angered by other people’s lack of manners, but shouting louder is not going to solve the issue.  Instead, choose your moments wisely, make sure what you say is valid and accurate and concise.  Great speakers don’t always shout their message loudest, they engage their audience, capture their attention and hold them enthralled.  If you can learn to do that, you could whisper your opinion and it would be heard.

Why is it so hard to change my lifestyle?

15 years ago I gave up smoking overnight – just decided that now was the right time for me, and I went cold turkey.  I knew it was bad for me, and my new girlfriend didn’t like it, so I stubbed out my last cigarette and haven’t looked back since.

But now I want to cut down on alcohol use, yet the little voice in my head still whispers about having a glass of wine, and I cannot walk past the bottle of scotch without a sideways glance!  When I do then have a drink, I find it hard to limit the consumption to a sensible amount – a glass or two becomes three or four, then a shot or two to follow.  I wake next morning feeling rough, vowing to myself “never again” but that is soon forgotten.  I never learn.

I know I need to cut down on eating salty food, and fatty food, and processed food, but the lure of the Chinese takeaway is too great.  Or another packet of crisps!  At the moment I’m eating those pasta-in-a-mug type packets, which are laden with salt, sugar, and other stuff that’s not good for me – but I choose the less than 3% fat ones to fool myself into thinking I’m opting for the healthier choice. 

I love cooking and preparing food – I can quite happily prepare a delicious salad with something like fishcakes to accompany it – but if there’s the slightest hint that I could have some junk food, I’ll gladly put off the healthier food choice in favour of the fast food fix.  I seem to be addicted to fatty, salty foods!

Then there’s the whole exercise thing.  I know I need to stay fit in order to get the most out of life.  I don’t much care for swimming, I find it quite boring.  I like cycling though, but despite thinking “I fancy a bike ride” I never get the bike out! I own a dozen fitness dvd’s and a wii fit, a Reebok step, a skipping rope, dumbells – none of them get used!  Why am I so lazy?  I know deep down that any effort I make today will reap rewards several times over tomorrow, and that once I get into the exercise routine, the addictive quality of the endorphins will keep me going – so why is it so hard to start?

I know these small, simple lifestyle changes are easy to make.  I know the change will be for the best, and that if I gave myself a chance, I would enjoy the changes.  My quality of life will be greatly improved, my health and vitality will be better.  My sleep will improve, my energy will increase, my attention will not so easily be distracted.  I will look and feel better.  I will be happier.

So why can’t I just get started?  Why is my will so weak?  I’ve even tried small steps – “just make one small change today!”  Er…no.  Grab some crisps and watch TV instead.  OK, great idea!  Is it laziness or lack of motivation?  Do I not care that I’m restricting myself to a life of being overweight and lethargic?  It just doesn’t make sense!