Writing

I’ve always enjoyed writing – I think because the stories have a way of transporting you from this world to any other.  Stories can draw you in, wrap you in an alternative reality and leave you happy, disturbed, afraid, sentimental.

I have written short stories, a full length sci-fi novel (never published, it was way too awful for that!) and blog posts.  I’ve kept a diary, written long, long letters to friends, and I keep a journal which is a cross between a scrapbook, sketchpad, diary, to do list and photo album. 

When my daughter was born 11 years ago, I started a Word document, and I wrote about everything about her – how I felt, how confused I was when she cried for no apparent reason, how tired I felt, how useless I felt.  I would add a new paragraph or two every day, then every week, then each month, and so it grew.

As she grew I wrote about her first word, her first laugh, her favourite foods, her favourite TV programme, and her favourite toys.  Then about the things that became important to her, school, friendships, sports, talents, aspirations.

I only stopped writing it last year, because she’s began to keep a diary of her own.  She’s old enough to remember her milestone moments herself now.

I love writing.  I love the idea that someone, somewhere, could be reading this and getting a fresh idea for a project of their own – that I might be reaching across countless miles and touching, albeit briefly, another life out there.

When I began this blog, I had the fanciful notion that it would be read all over the world – that I would attract followers keen to read the next insightful, quippy observation.  I dreamed of people leaving me comments, feedback, encouragement – I thought a community would develop and grow.  Sadly nothing of that sort has happened.  I was excited when I saw a post had 22 views.  Now I’m lucky if I get 3! 

So, help me out here, casual visitor to this page – please leave me a comment or two and answer this – is my writing boring?  What is it lacking? Where am I going wrong?   Don’t get me wrong – this isn’t some self-pity plea.  I still want that dream to come true – but as with most things, you need some critique to develop skills past their infancy.    Thank you!

The Turning World

Hello!

It's a chilly May 5th here in Cornwall - we have had a mixture of warm sunny days and windy chill days lately - not quite summer yet, but the promise is just around the corner.
I last wrote this back in February - I was recovering from my radiotherapy then, so my desire to write was quite low.  I am now in remission, slowly getting my voice back to normal, and not quite so tired every day, so here I am!

I have been thinking about how time passes - the turning of the planet - how a day starts, opens up as you pass through it, and closes down at night.  The days become weeks, and for me it's been a pathway - walking along from one test, appointment, consultation, procedure - to the next.  I started the journey over a year ago, and I am finally realising that my path is no longer dictated by these mile markers any more.  Sure I still have appointments, but they're not the centre of the universe any more.

So the weeks and months pass by, each segment filled with tasks completed, new things to do, forms to submit, reviews to attend, and always, always, there's the future to contemplate.  Where will it take me?  What do I need to do now to make the journey easier?  More successful?  What are the likely outcomes?

As I sit here, writing this, I am aware that the world has turned a bit more - another 5 degrees through it's circle of time - another few thousand miles along it's seasonal trip around the Sun, and I am warmed by the knowledge that my life is unfolding as it should.   I am happy.

Getting the Balance Right

Hello!
Where to start?

I want to talk about balance today, not the physical, teetering on a gymnastics beam type balance, but the "getting stuff done vs taking it easy" type.

I mention this because I notice my last post was in August last year! No, I haven't been doing nothing all this time, but I have not been managing my time very well.  I've had days where I have been wall-to-wall busy, and I've had days when I just CBA (Can't Be Arsed).

I found out last September that I was very ill - the sort of ill that needs radiotherapy for 6 weeks, and months of recovery.  I felt physically drained and emotionally wrung out - so some might say I've had a good reason to neglect the blog, but to be honest, I haven't.

It's very easy to let things slide though.  I like to keep busy, I help my wife with the chores, I cook our meals, I help her with her business, I make scale model armoured vehicles, I write a journal daily, do some gardening, and so on.  My days are filled - and yet I've avoided some things like the plague!

I've not written this blog, I have not posted any pictures or updates to my other military model making blog, I have not updated or maintained the two websites I made for local business friends.  It's like my heart just isn't in it - and yet these things have just as much importance, if not more, as checking Facebook, or looking at Pinterest.

It's all about time management really, and having effective To Do lists. Making sure the small details are not forgotten, and taking the time to get the balance right.

So, the next time I'm flicking through the myriad of Sky channels bemoaning the fact that there's nothing worth watching on TV, I shall be popping by here to share another thought or two with you!

Balance - maybe it is a physical thing after all?

You might also like:
http://collywobs.blogspot.co.uk/2017/05/the-turning-world.html

Perspective

Good Morning!
(or is it?)

Woke up this morning feeling great!
(woke up this morning tired and hungover)

Drove into work with the radio on, singing along to my favourite songs...
(Oh Great! Another boring day at the Grindstone)
...knowing that I was going to be helping people today...
(why can't these people just remember their passwords?  It's not rocket science!)
...and the Sun is Shining :)
(and to cap it all, it's a lovely day out there and I'm stuck in here all day).

Got to work, put the coffee on... deep breath, ah nice!  Ready to GO!
(why is it always me has to put the coffee on?  Why can't someone else do it for a change?)

First caller of the day's so glad I sorted her IT problem out, now she feels happy, so I'm happy.
(I'm so sick of people ringing about their stupid problems! Waste of my time!)
Next caller is so grateful that I could help him, he emailed my boss to say I did a great job! Wow!!
(all I did was sigh, you'd think I swore at the caller.  I don't deserve a complaint for just sighing ffs)
Go for a walk in the sunshine at lunchtime...
(sit at my desk watching YouTube, but the phone keeps ringing...)
...and return refreshed, ready for the afternoon's work!
(grumpier than ever because I've not had a chance to have a break yet)
Work through my workload steadily, prioritised so the important stuff gets done first.
(can't be bothered, waste of time, what's the point)

Get home, hug family, welcome kisses, happy dog - tail wagging.
(ah home at last! Boy have I had a shit day! Get outta my way Rex! Stupid dog!)
Cook something nice for our dinner - I love cooking, providing tasty food for my family!
(why do I have to cook?  Been at work all day. Ah what the hell, fast-food'll do for tonight)
Sit with my family and watch a movie together, kids are messing about, we're all laughing about it.
(guts feel awful - bloated and uncomfortable. Shut up ffs, I'm trying to watch TV!)

Off to bed, nicely tired - I've had a good day!
(Think I'll just have another large one before the late night film ends)

Out of Sight, Out of Mind...

Forgive me Father, for I have sinned.
It's been two months and three days since my last post!

It's so easy to forget to do devote the time to writing when there are other things going on.  Work, cooking, helping my wife with her business, gardening, shopping, watching TV.

But there's no real excuse for letting your discipline slide.  It's not laziness.  It's distraction, and a little bit of forgetfulness, with a smidgen of dreaded "what should I write about?" thrown in for good measure.

But I really like writing.  Even if what I write is never seen by another soul (although I'd much prefer it if it were) I write it anyway.

I keep a journal - A5 plain paper notebook (nu: elite) and in it I write how I'm feeling, what I'm doing, To Do lists, I paste in tickets and labels of things I like - wine and whiskey mainly!  I'll add pictures that inspire me, quotes and my own doodles, drawings and sketches.  The occasional photograph, stamps, a bit of ribbon or a luggage label, Post-It note, whatever.

The only person likely to ever read it is my (currently 10 years old) daughter - when she's older.  So I write it for her I suppose.  A constant record of who I am, what I like,how I feel about my home, my family, my work, my life.

My parents died when I was 6 - A part of me wishes I knew them better.  Not something my daughter will ever have to worry about!  My Journals, my Blog, My Facebook account.  I created her an email account when she was a few years old so that I could create her a FB account (so that we can tag her to stuff, build up her timeline), and so I email her every now and then - just to say I love you, or I'm thinking about you, or maybe some fatherly advice.

She doesn't have access to it yet, nor can she log into her Facebook account yet.  It's all there for when she's older.

I have also kept a Word document going since she was born - an ongoing diary of being a first time parent - but it records everything.  Her first clap, first laugh, first word, first steps.  Her likes and dislikes, what she's reading, watching on TV Her favourite foods, toys, friends. And how I feel - happy, sad, exhausted, frustrated, confused, ecstatic, proud, elated.  I'm sure she'll find it handy when she has her first child?

As I said, I really like writing.  I might never get published, or read outside of a very small audience, but I don't write for recognition or fame or wealth.  I write because I enjoy it.
Full stop.
Three Hail Mary's and I'll be fine.

Thank you for reading this!  You might also like:
http://collywobs.blogspot.co.uk/2017/05/writing.html

Respect - The keystone to life?

I was walking my dog the other day, and stood aside to let a college girl past us.  She said a very polite thank you.

Just then a group of three student lads passed by, rowdy, full of it - cocky in their youth.

I then dipped into an entirely imaginary scenario where the lads started teasing the girl, calling her names, wolf-whistles etc.  I had experienced this sort of behavior loads of times in London, which is probably why I was expecting it.

In my imagined scenario, I challenge the behavior, stand up for the girl.  I am noble and courageous - their youth and numbers do not intimidate me.

As I continue to walk home I develop my speech, refine it, hone it, until to me it becomes worthy of a Shakespearean soliloquy!  Now, I know all this might seem a bit pointless, recording this here now - but in fact the message is possibly worth sharing.  It's all about respect.

In my imagined confrontation, I suggest the lads leave the girl alone.  I tell them that whatever they may think of the girl, or know about her, their behavior is unacceptable.  I suffer the usual taunts of "who are you? Her granddad?" and so on - which I bear with unflinching stoicism.  My retort is not meant to me antagonistic nor unkind.

I reply that despite what they may think of her, they should still treat her with a little respect.  If they did that, then I would have more respect for them, and if that were so, I would hope they would have a little respect for me.

I go on to explain that education, intelligence and being clever isn't always all it is cracked up to be.  That having a degree does not guarantee a future, that attaining a diploma, without a hint of humility or respect does not mean you'll get a job.

I give an example of where, at a recent job interview I had to decide between two candidates - one that had qualifications coming out of his ears but was arrogant about it, and one that had less education, but showed respect and humility.  I'd be far more inclined to employ the latter - i said.

Respect encourages forgiveness, it fosters good relations, and increases the chances of greater opportunities.  No one likes a smart-arse.  No matter how qualified you are, how talented - interpersonal skills are equally as important.

By the time I got home and the dog was curled up in his bed, satisfied by his wanderings, I had put the whole world to rights!

I believe this to be true.  You can be the best qualified person for a role, highly skilled, completely competent, and possibly the person who should be chosen - but if your attitude stinks, if you fail to show some respect, you may find that door closing in your face.

Opinions

You will realise one day that people like the sound of their own voice.

Some people think that their opinion is so important; they’ll talk over someone else to express it.  When a discussion takes place, the one with the loudest voice will drown out the more considered views.  I see it all the time, people will be chatting about something – I think I have something valid to add, I wait for a gap in the conversation, start to say my bit, only to find I’m talked over and ignored – like my input, my voice, isn’t worth listening to. So I shut up.

Now I used to think it’s because I talk rubbish, but in fact it’s because I don’t talk about the subjects they want to talk about or because I disagree with them, or maybe they just think I’m boring?  I often find their subject boring, mundane, pointless or just plain wrong – but at least I give them the courtesy of listening.

It’s said that people like that are assertive, are passionate about what they believe in.  I think they’re just ignorant.  Either that or they’re afraid.  Afraid that if someone else gets heard, then they’ll be ignored, shut out, talked over.

It frustrates me that I am often ignored.  I am angered by other people’s lack of manners, but shouting louder is not going to solve the issue.  Instead, choose your moments wisely, make sure what you say is valid and accurate and concise.  Great speakers don’t always shout their message loudest, they engage their audience, capture their attention and hold them enthralled.  If you can learn to do that, you could whisper your opinion and it would be heard.