Friendship

One of the most important things we can ever have is a friend. My best friend also happens to be my wife, and my daughter is also my best friend - or so she tells me. But then her teddy bear is also her best friend, and so is next doors cat, and the boy on the swings at the park. Even with these flighty, fickle standards, I know I feature in there somewhere.

But apart from wife and daughter, I don't really have that many other friends. I have people I work with - I like them, they like me. We do stuff for each other, and go for a drink after work sometimes. But they're not real "friends". I would expect them to miss me a little when I die, but not to go to my funeral and remember me forever afterwards.

My wife tells me I should have more friends, get out more - but if I'm being honest, I have enough friends. I have my very best friend (wife), and my best mate from London (who I never keep in contact with), and some old work and polytechnic buddies I stay loosely in touch with via Facebook, and even a few from the US who I befriended via FB - but we're not inseperable. We don't have that deep bond that real friends have. But I'm OK with that - I like them just as they are.

I think my wife thinks that this lack of friends makes me lonely, but in actual fact, it doesn't. I am comfortable with myself, and am happy in my own company. I easily live up to my own expectations and rarely am boring or dull. I laugh at my jokes, know just what I'm thinking, and don't need to fill the silences. I fit myself like an old slipper.

Oh, and I don't forget my birthday!

Friendship, true, deep friendship, is a rare commodity - and when I find it I treasure it - but I'm a bit too insular, a bit too reserved. I used to think I was antisocial - but I'm not, because in a social situation I am outgoing and funny, warm and friendly, sincere and attentive and nice. No, I'm not anti social, i'm just not sociable. I do not seek friends, or friendship, for it's own sake.